A friend sent this to me by email and I love every one of these. I have to agree and I have to share.
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're totally wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty
sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the
person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at
work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything
productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I
don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks
me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that
I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not
to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just
nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they
said?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team
up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong,
brothers and sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get
dirty, and you can wear them forever.
22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still
not know what time it is.
23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car
keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on
the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button
from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every
time!
24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874
and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100
years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
(Ladies.....Quit Laughing.)
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Monday, September 6, 2010
My "Friday Night Lights" Experience
I live in a town that exists only for High School Football. The Katy Tigers have won many State Championships (I don't know how many nor do I know which years although it is printed on everything from t-shirts to water towers around here) and the fans are proud of their team. A movie is in production right now about the Katy Tigers. Seriously, we are a big deal. Both of my kids attend Katy High School and my daughter is in the Color Guard which is considered part of "That Roaring Band from Tigerland". She even attended Band Camp, but that is another blog.
My son plays football for the sophomore team. Their games are held at the school, on week nights, and are pretty easy for parents to attend after a work day. You just show up, buy a ticket, grab some peanuts then sit and enjoy. Simple. Easy. Nice family time.
Varsity is a whole other ballgame. In Katy, it is a religious experience.
Tickets usually sell out so you have to purchase them in advance. General seating tickets are about $6 in advance and $10 at the gate. Student tickets are cheaper and students who play athletics have free passes. No chance of ever getting season tickets unless you are related to a Katy Alum who has willed them to you. Seriously. Someone has to die.
The game started at 6PM but the gates opened at 3PM for the tailgate parties (Really? Tailgate parties at a high school game?). Since my daughter is "with the band" she had to be at school by 2:30 for preparation and practice. The buses would then transport them to the stadium for the game. In my mind the game has started the second I have to drive one of my kids somewhere for the sake of the game.
My son and I head to the game leaving roughly and hour before kickoff. The traffic was ridiculous. People were driving batshit crazy to get into the line to enter the stadium. Parking was another challenge. Since my son has an athletic pass he had a special gate he had to enter but forgot which one it was so of course we went to all before finding it.
Entering the stadium was like entering a football flea market. There were roughly 6-8 tables set up with everything imaginable bearing the Katy Tigers name in some way shape or form. The usual football game items like t-shirts, pom poms, koozies, mugs, key chains, bumper stickers, and hats were abundant. But I also saw belts, socks, flip flops, large car magnets, calendars, polo shirts, dress shirts, ties, wallets, purses, flags, umbrellas, ponchos, towels and tote bags. Prices ranged from $2 to $50 and the fans were buying them. The crowd of people around the tables was impossible to penetrate. It was like a Macy's red tag sale. I think I saw a little hair pulling going on. No lie.
My son abandoned me to be with his friends so I was on my own to find my way to the bleachers through the sea of red and white. I was wearing the only red shirt I own. It is not a Katy Tigers shirt but it is red. I may have been the one lone person on the Katy side not wearing a shirt bearing my team's name. People stared. I saw a few heads shake and swear I heard a gasp or two. I bravely took my walk of shame and found a spot to sit at the 40 yard line.
The Katy side of the stadium was packed. There were people sitting on the grass in the end zone for lack of seats. The visitor side was pathetically sparse with entire sections of rows that were empty. The only full sections were at the 50 yard line and the area blocked for the band. It may have been a respectable turn out for any other away game, but not for Katy fans. I must admit I was kind of proud.
It didn't take long for me to realize I was sitting in the wrong place. Everyone around me was talking and seemed to know each other well plus I didn't see a single soul I knew. I asked the woman next to me if I had accidentally parked myself in the reserved seats. She nodded her head sadly and looked at me like I was some kind of pathetic dumbass for not knowing. She pointed to a very small section in front but near the 20 yard line where the general ticket seats were located. Those were completely packed, standing room only. I told her I was "new" and she must of felt sorry for me because she let me sit in her husband's space since he wasn't coming. I was very grateful for the break and figured karma was finally kicking in for me.
Apparently there is a series of chants, cheers, singing and jumping that all of the seasoned fans know of and us "newbies" are required to learn. There is no manual. You watch and learn. Taking notes would have helped. I will try to give you the basics without overwhelming anyone.
1. You stand up when the Tigers are about to do something. If they are about to kick or breathe you wave your right arm toward the goal. You do this in a rhythmic manner to beat of a drum.
2. You stand and clap to an 8 count beat when they do something good such as kick, catch, or tackle the opponent.
3. Everyone holds hands and sings whenever the school song is played. This is mandatory. If you don't people will glare at you. If you don't know the words just move your lips. I faked it in church for years I can fake it here.
4. Every now and then you must scream at the top of your lungs "GO TIGERS". I'm still unsure as to the appropriate moment to do this but it doesn't really seem to matter to anyone. Just do it.
5. You MUST jump up and high five your neighbor when a touchdown is scored. No getting around it. You will be trampled if you don't. Then the whole clapping thing starts again (see #2 above).
In summary, you stand up, wave arm, clap to a beat, sit down, stand up, jump up and high five, clap to a beat, sit down, stand up scream GO TIGERS!, and then hold hands and sing.
Rinse and repeat all of the above about 20 times and you will have an idea of what my night was like. It was hard work! I was exhausted. I must mention the small child behind me that kept screaming GO TIGERS! in my ear and hitting me in the head with a pom pom and the elderly man in front of me that barked like a dog through a megaphone. I was exhausted AND had a headache thankyouverymuch.
The game ended victorious (of course) and after a lot of jumping, screaming and high-fiving I could finally go home. After locating my son we took the long trek to the car in which we sat an even longer time because we couldn't move. The parking lot was packed and no one was going anywhere. It reminded me of our gridlocked freeways with people trying to flee the area when Hurricane Rita was heading our direction back in 2005. Here is a reminder photo below in case you have forgotten.
Finally we inch our way out of the parking lot and head over to the high school to pick up my daughter. Half an hour and five buses later she arrives exhausted and hungry and ready to go home. We make it through another traffic snarl (my third one for the day) and arrive at home around 10:30 PM. That little three hour game took up 8 hours of my life and all I did was watch it. Kudos to all of the parents and Tiger fans who actually had a hand in making it happen. There had to be hundreds of volunteers involved in the production and to think they do this every week. They truly have Tiger in their blood to be that dedicated.
I'm glad I went to the game and got a little taste of what is to come. I have a couple of years before my son plays varsity so I can sit back and breathe for a little bit. It gives me a chance to practice my arm waving and chanting. I might even learn the words to the school song. I do know that no matter how enamored I become of the Katy Tigers I will never ever feel the need to bark like a dog through a megaphone. I may feel compelled to smack some small child on the back of the head with a pom pom though. That is more my style. GO TIGERS!
My son plays football for the sophomore team. Their games are held at the school, on week nights, and are pretty easy for parents to attend after a work day. You just show up, buy a ticket, grab some peanuts then sit and enjoy. Simple. Easy. Nice family time.
Varsity is a whole other ballgame. In Katy, it is a religious experience.
Tickets usually sell out so you have to purchase them in advance. General seating tickets are about $6 in advance and $10 at the gate. Student tickets are cheaper and students who play athletics have free passes. No chance of ever getting season tickets unless you are related to a Katy Alum who has willed them to you. Seriously. Someone has to die.
The game started at 6PM but the gates opened at 3PM for the tailgate parties (Really? Tailgate parties at a high school game?). Since my daughter is "with the band" she had to be at school by 2:30 for preparation and practice. The buses would then transport them to the stadium for the game. In my mind the game has started the second I have to drive one of my kids somewhere for the sake of the game.
My son and I head to the game leaving roughly and hour before kickoff. The traffic was ridiculous. People were driving batshit crazy to get into the line to enter the stadium. Parking was another challenge. Since my son has an athletic pass he had a special gate he had to enter but forgot which one it was so of course we went to all before finding it.
Entering the stadium was like entering a football flea market. There were roughly 6-8 tables set up with everything imaginable bearing the Katy Tigers name in some way shape or form. The usual football game items like t-shirts, pom poms, koozies, mugs, key chains, bumper stickers, and hats were abundant. But I also saw belts, socks, flip flops, large car magnets, calendars, polo shirts, dress shirts, ties, wallets, purses, flags, umbrellas, ponchos, towels and tote bags. Prices ranged from $2 to $50 and the fans were buying them. The crowd of people around the tables was impossible to penetrate. It was like a Macy's red tag sale. I think I saw a little hair pulling going on. No lie.
My son abandoned me to be with his friends so I was on my own to find my way to the bleachers through the sea of red and white. I was wearing the only red shirt I own. It is not a Katy Tigers shirt but it is red. I may have been the one lone person on the Katy side not wearing a shirt bearing my team's name. People stared. I saw a few heads shake and swear I heard a gasp or two. I bravely took my walk of shame and found a spot to sit at the 40 yard line.
The Katy side of the stadium was packed. There were people sitting on the grass in the end zone for lack of seats. The visitor side was pathetically sparse with entire sections of rows that were empty. The only full sections were at the 50 yard line and the area blocked for the band. It may have been a respectable turn out for any other away game, but not for Katy fans. I must admit I was kind of proud.
It didn't take long for me to realize I was sitting in the wrong place. Everyone around me was talking and seemed to know each other well plus I didn't see a single soul I knew. I asked the woman next to me if I had accidentally parked myself in the reserved seats. She nodded her head sadly and looked at me like I was some kind of pathetic dumbass for not knowing. She pointed to a very small section in front but near the 20 yard line where the general ticket seats were located. Those were completely packed, standing room only. I told her I was "new" and she must of felt sorry for me because she let me sit in her husband's space since he wasn't coming. I was very grateful for the break and figured karma was finally kicking in for me.
Apparently there is a series of chants, cheers, singing and jumping that all of the seasoned fans know of and us "newbies" are required to learn. There is no manual. You watch and learn. Taking notes would have helped. I will try to give you the basics without overwhelming anyone.
1. You stand up when the Tigers are about to do something. If they are about to kick or breathe you wave your right arm toward the goal. You do this in a rhythmic manner to beat of a drum.
2. You stand and clap to an 8 count beat when they do something good such as kick, catch, or tackle the opponent.
3. Everyone holds hands and sings whenever the school song is played. This is mandatory. If you don't people will glare at you. If you don't know the words just move your lips. I faked it in church for years I can fake it here.
4. Every now and then you must scream at the top of your lungs "GO TIGERS". I'm still unsure as to the appropriate moment to do this but it doesn't really seem to matter to anyone. Just do it.
5. You MUST jump up and high five your neighbor when a touchdown is scored. No getting around it. You will be trampled if you don't. Then the whole clapping thing starts again (see #2 above).
In summary, you stand up, wave arm, clap to a beat, sit down, stand up, jump up and high five, clap to a beat, sit down, stand up scream GO TIGERS!, and then hold hands and sing.
Rinse and repeat all of the above about 20 times and you will have an idea of what my night was like. It was hard work! I was exhausted. I must mention the small child behind me that kept screaming GO TIGERS! in my ear and hitting me in the head with a pom pom and the elderly man in front of me that barked like a dog through a megaphone. I was exhausted AND had a headache thankyouverymuch.
Finally we inch our way out of the parking lot and head over to the high school to pick up my daughter. Half an hour and five buses later she arrives exhausted and hungry and ready to go home. We make it through another traffic snarl (my third one for the day) and arrive at home around 10:30 PM. That little three hour game took up 8 hours of my life and all I did was watch it. Kudos to all of the parents and Tiger fans who actually had a hand in making it happen. There had to be hundreds of volunteers involved in the production and to think they do this every week. They truly have Tiger in their blood to be that dedicated.
I'm glad I went to the game and got a little taste of what is to come. I have a couple of years before my son plays varsity so I can sit back and breathe for a little bit. It gives me a chance to practice my arm waving and chanting. I might even learn the words to the school song. I do know that no matter how enamored I become of the Katy Tigers I will never ever feel the need to bark like a dog through a megaphone. I may feel compelled to smack some small child on the back of the head with a pom pom though. That is more my style. GO TIGERS!
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